I recently read a post by Hybrid Mom about male perceptions of women in the workplace. The main takeaway was that men see any type of emotion as the inability to think clearly. Tears, anger, sighing, it didn’t matter. The perception was the same.
I know ladies, this is crazy. But, we also know that men think way different than us, so I thought it would be nice to give a few tips on getting our point across without getting visibly emotional. After all, that great point you’re making is not as helpful if no one hears it because they are distracted by you “acting crazy.”
Tip 1: Flex your toes up and down in your shoes. Whenever I find myself getting agitated or frustrated I do this. It helps me channel the energy to a part of my body that is not seen. No one is looking at my feet under the meeting table. Just be sure to keep a pleasant facial expression.
Tip 2: Take deep breaths with your mouth slightly opened. Be sure these deep breaths are silent and your shoulders are not going up and down. This may take some practice. I do this by keeping a slight, attentive smile on my face as I wait my turn to speak. If I need another deterrent I will look down slightly and write as if I’m taking notes. This is something I do anyway, so it doesn’t stand out.
Tip 3: If possible, remove yourself from the situation and offer to give feedback later. Then take a walk, call someone that will calm you down, etc. You can say you need to research some things or you have a few ideas you want to flush out first. Bathroom breaks work too… J
Tip 4: Ask questions. First of all, questions are a great way to get more information and to make sure you understand what is being said. Secondly, it gives you time to gather your thoughts and calm down before speaking.
Tip 5: Smile. I know this sounds crazy, and I’m not suggesting you do a huge, all teeth showing smile, but smiles send positive messages to our brain. So, the next time you feel like you are going to lose it, try it. You might be surprised.
Let me say that these are just tips. I do not suggest that you change everything about yourself to conform to another’s ideal of how you should be. However, there are times when we would like to make a point and we want to minimize any distractions. It is in these instances I offer these tips.
That’s also why none of the tips encourage you to be more masculine or dress less ladylike. We have much power in our ability to think differently, process lots of information at once and to be fabulous.
Do you have an issue with showing your emotions? Have you found other ways to help you get your point across to the opposite sex?
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Peoples perceptions can get in the way of so much. Imagine the time we’d save if we could just erase that part of our lives? The last three posts on my site have actually been about how people perceive my as a SAHM. Great post!